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In Passing

by The Split Infinitives

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1.
I’ve lived in different states And seen so much in many different ways I’ve been other people A series of experiences retold I love driving through The country, where landscapes feel new Even if I’ve traveled these roads These highways and interstates never get old I know I’ve no control So if I focus, I can feel my soul Expanding, reaching further Out into the center of the universe And it is bright, and it is elation It is beyond infinite imagination I’m slowly learning That I don’t have to worry Where am I going next? What’s coming for me? When am I gonna be In the wrong place, at the wrong time?
2.
The fear’s gonna come again Just when I think it’s gone I know that something’s wrong Whether it’s comfort or alarm I invent The fear’s gonna come again That there’s nothing to be Just as I part with the last of me That’s when everything is happening And there’s nothing to feel And there’s nothing to be Except in line for my expiry I take in the weight of living And I can’t take any of it with me Nor will I know all that might be When I take my turn for my expiry The fear’s gonna come again
3.
The Rabbit 02:39
I was eight years old I was coming from school I got off at my stop In the middle of the afternoon I was with my friends And kids who rode with us We played tag in the morning Waiting for the bus We were walking To our complex up an asphalt path I saw the rabbit on the street Its skull cracked open, lying on its back Its brain was spilling Out of the top of its head It was the first I had seen A once-living creature dead There was no peace There was no ceremony I saw something empty Now there’s no way of unknowing The rabbit looked to the sky The rabbit looked into my eyes I want to look away But I can’t break the gaze
4.
In Passing 04:07
In passing, I heard sound In passing, I saw lights In passing, I found friends In passing, I picked fights Nothing feels like it’s mine In passing, I learned to laugh In passing, I met brilliant minds In passing, I have lived life In passing, I watched others leave it behind And other inevitabilities with time Sometimes I feel as though it never happened And, for all I know, maybe it didn’t
5.
Stranger 08:58
Hey stranger, won’t you come closer We don’t know each other yet But that can be undone That can be undone Hey stranger, I saw you turn my way It wasn’t only a fleeting glance Rather, it was deliberate It was deliberate Hey stranger, I heard a disembodied voice In my ears, off of your lips Guiding me outside myself Guiding me outside myself I want to see Your perfect face I want to hear Each perfect word you say Under surges Under raining lights that f pour Under walls of sound Under the noise I ignore I want to feel Your fingers’ grip I want pressure Of you pulling my wrist Into the hinterland Into the grooving forrest Into the limbs Into the ardent and sordid I want to know You at your core I want us to be All that we adore Outside humanity Outside of all hope Outside our vessels Outside, and all alone And it shakes And it trembles And it shudders Throughout dimensions And it stifles And I can’t breathe And it consume And it’s a release
6.
I missed your calls But I got your message I didn’t think it would get to me But I still let it I needed to be alone I didn’t want to get too close Nothing was making sense But maybe I was just tired My thoughts weren’t coming together I couldn’t get a hold of my words I wish you could’ve been there
7.
Were we ever close Did I let you in on my secrets Were you the same in that way Did you confide in me of your demons Did what you say matter, big or small Are you my brother Am I your keeper Has it just slipped my mind Whatever we were I want to believe you mattered after all Did I m even see you with sonder Your mortal passage seen from afar An unfolding narrative That was real, but of which I wasn’t a part I know then, I didn’t matter at all Except I knew you once Did we know each other well enough That you’ll speak for me That I’ll speak for you? That you’ve kind memories That I remember good things too? I figured we wouldn’t stay in one place But I never thought you’d fade away
8.
I don’t see the heavens But what I see is heavenly And if I don’t quite ascend I hope the Earth takes what’s left of me Perhaps what knowing the truth means Not seeing aged testaments But feeling blessed in such enveloping beauty Even when you’ve reached your end of it And when you look up wide Turn your gaze from above, look ahead Look at others with the same open eyes Even when it’s hard, just do your best You don’t need to have the answers But you should know just how much living can hurt
9.
I want to end these sleepless nights Wake up tomorrow, where everything is fine I want to go to work, and run out my shift And forget that the time I’m wringing out is limited I want to see my best friend sometime next week Do whatever comes up, and leaves vague memories I want to take my brothers and sisters around Show them the city, have a nice time somehow I want to have a conversation where I’m not second-guessing what I said, pulling out my hair I want the serenity in the universe To be the gift of a gracious observer I want to live forever, and never be alone Find comfort for the same fears every person knows I want to surrender to the noise Of the answers to the questions I can’t avoid I don’t want to worry Though I still worry [x4] Where am I going next? What’s coming for me? When am I gonna be In the wrong place, at the wrong time? I ought to take more moments To stand and really notice Instead of searching Because there’s no hurry
10.
I'm losing the words I'm losing a loved one I'm losing my best friend I'm losing control I'm losing the energy I'm losing my focus I'm losing my patience I'm losing my faith And I don't know why I needed to be alone
11.
Baptism 04:44
I went out in the rain I became confused, and lost my place I fell to the ground There was thunder, then no sound But it was baptism An almighty flood of remission The demons left my body I stood up, and started walking I’m lighter now Slowly, and unsure But I look around At a loss for words But under falling clouds I’m left with wonder An eye is looking out For my return Until then, I want to turn my spirit into my voice And give it back to the world

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Most serious-minded album. I mean, talk about a bummer of a record.

credits

released September 17, 2015

Holden Martinson - vocals, guitars, bass, drums, piano, loops, programing, production, mixing, engineering, artwork

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The Split Infinitives Salt Lake City, Utah

Project founded by Holden Martinson and Brian Adkins in 2008.

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